Year Without Fear

written by: Veronica

So, it happened!  I. Turned. Thirty. Five.  I must say this was a rough one.  I am so grateful to be in the land of the living.  Breathing. Thriving.  I am so thankful for friends and family alike, constantly pouring into my life.  But, this birthday was a rough one.  So many things unsettled.  So many dreams unrealized.  It all hit me like a ton of bricks.  I didn’t fully see it coming.  Facing myself and the realities of where I am proved to be more than I was prepared to bare.  What if my life does not play out the way I planned?  What if this is as good as it gets?

Well, there’s good news and bad news, which would you like first?  The bad news is my life may not play out how I planned.  Even if I had all the things I wanted by thirty-five, there is no guarantee that I wouldn’t feel any less confused than I do right now.  The good news is “as good as it gets” is really up to me.  I can take my current season and live the life of MY choosing.  Now, more than ever before, I realized the importance of being present.  Seizing every opportunity.  Living.  Truly living.  So! I am challenging myself this year of 35, to be fearless.  Effective now, I am deeming this my year without fear. 

First up!! Snip! Snip!  So, I have been talking about cutting my hair for a while.  I researched styles, talked to other naturalistas with short cuts, and found a stylist I felt I could trust.  But I backed out of it several times.  While I had cut my hair before, it wasn’t that drastic of a cut.  And I was worried!! What if it didn’t look right?  What about my ponytail?!?!?  What if it didn’t grow back?  It seemed so permanent!  But it would be the perfect way to kick off my year without fear!  So, I buckled down, and made an appointment.

I chose The Chicago Curl Collective.  My stylist and Soror, Daria (more affectionately known as Dee) could feel my nerves in the door.  She sat me down and just talked with me first.  Then, even though I already sent her pictures of a style, she had me look at various styles on her iPad.  In her consultation, she explained the process, and made sure we were on the same page.  She addressed concerns I hadn’t even considered, and really made me feel ready to begin.  Her thoroughness continued throughout the entire process as she educated me on aftercare, products to use, and other next steps.  Not to mention, her twist-out game is MEEEAAANNN!!  All the stylists in the shop were so friendly and encouraging.  The aesthetic of the shop was very modern, complete with a power porting station in the dryer section and soulful tunes playing in the background.  I am not a beauty shop girl, but to THIS shop, I will be returning.  Worth.  Every. Penny!!

I walked out of the shop with fewer inches of hair and some life lessons:

  •  Fearlessness isn’t something that just happens.  It is something that is progressively attained with practice.  Every once in a while, shake it up!  Do something that absolutely terrifies you.  Shock your own damn self!  It’s what being alive is all about!
  •  Sometimes change is good.  Since my cut, I have been forced to try new hairstyles.  Breaking the routine and monotony of the past.  Switch up your routine.  Talk to some people you wouldn’t.  Take a different route home.  You will find new details and lessons unveiled in your willingness to try it a different way.
  •  Good or bad, it will be ok on the other side of fear.  I think one reason fear gets the best of people is that they are so uncertain of what will be on the other side.  In this tiny step, I learned that regardless of how the chips fell, I was ok.  I take that back! I was better!  More confident in my ability to leap into the unknown.  More self-aware of what works and doesn’t work in my own life.  More badass!

They say a woman that cuts her hair, changes her life.  Well, this Bestie right here is ready for that change.  Conquering each desire, one step at a time.  First, haircut. Next? Who knows?? I am open.  I am willing.  I am present.  I will keep you posted, and I’d love for you to keep me accountable!  Or, better yet?!!? Join me!



Thank you so much Dee and the entire Chicago Curl Collective Family for allowing me to feature you!  Continued success to you!  You can check out Daria (Dee) or any of the amazing stylists at:

Chicago Curl Collective

923 W. 35th Street

Chicago, IL 60609



ensemble deets:   Duster - Loft ( similar )  Graphic Sweatshirt - H&M (last season)  Jeans - Levis ( website )  Shoes - Nine West ( similar )

ensemble deets:

Duster - Loft (similar)

Graphic Sweatshirt - H&M (last season)

Jeans - Levis (website)

Shoes - Nine West (similar)


Images taken by: Monique (on my iPhone)


What are you conquering in 2017?  I would love to hear your stories in the comments below!

Happy New Year Besties!

Love Without Fear,