by Eboni Elise
I’m a married woman and have been with my husband for 9 years but I’ve never been the one to get excited about Valentine’s Day. We’ve never celebrated it in a major way and I’m cool with that. I’ve probably even rolled my eyes as I pass by the Valentine’s card displays at Target the day after New Years.
As I’ve gotten older, I find that Valentine’s Day is just another money making holiday. You can keep the overpriced, nasty chocolate that I don’t need anyway (I’m watching my figure LOL!), the giant teddy bear (I’m too grown for that) and the flowers…wait, bring those back. Those can stay.
To me, it’s really just another day. Not that I don’t want to express my love or have my spouse do the same. I don’t need 1 specific day for that to happen. In my opinion, if you love someone, you should make the effort to show them any day of the year.
Valentine’s Day puts too much pressure on people to spend money on unnecessary gifts or make disingenuous grand gestures to prove their love. We’re pretty much forced to define whatever relationship we are in because of this day. Speaking of gifts, if you don’t get one, a girl’s expectations and heart get cracked like an egg. And I won’t even start on those who find that same egg all over their face when they discover their V-day is actually celebrated on the 15th (aka side chick day). But that’s none of my business.
What might this day mean for those who don't want to be single or may be going through a breakup? Exactly - Real inconsiderate.
Back to my point…Love is an action word. You can tell me all day that you love me, leave love notes or even sing it. That’s nice but it means nothing if your actions don’t align with your words. Actions that should be done throughout the year, not bottled and defined just on a day like today. This goes for both partners in a relationship. Real love is reciprocal, a two-way street. One person giving 100% leaves an unbalanced, disappointed and maybe unappreciated other half.
Let’s avoid that. Decide to do something for your spouse or significant other not just today but every now and again this year. Put your love into action and create a “just because I love you day” in the near future.
Know your partner’s love language. (If you don’t read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman) Maybe sweet notes, flowers, and teddy bears are their thing. If so, do more of it!
If you feel like I feel, here are 9 "love" ideas to help:
- Cook your significant other's favorite meal or take a cooking class at The Chopping Block
- Surprise him or her with a date night. Don’t tell them where. Only let them know what to wear and what time to be ready.
- Go to the museum on a free day. For IL residents, check out free days in 2017 at http://www.choosechicago.com/articles/view/free-museum-days-in-chicago/556/
- Get her car fixed, pay a bill or buy him a new tie for their upcoming interview. Think of something useful. Be thoughtful!
- For 1 night, no cellphones or TV in the bedroom. Be intentional about giving him or her your undivided attention.
- Bring them lunch when he or she is having a long, busy day at work.
- Have a fondue night - blind fold taste test!
- If he or she cooks dinner, clean the kitchen without them having to ask.
- Take the kids out so she or he can have time to themselves.
Any other thoughts or ideas? Leave them in the comments below?