So…... I started this post focusing on maintenance tips but my motherly duties required me to pause and run to the store for cough medicine. While in line at the store, some stranger felt the need to “educate” me about my hair and why men don’t like it. Oh really, you wanna do this today? Ok. Let's go.
I went for a trim over the weekend so my hair is straight. She started by asking me if my hair was real 😒😒😒. So since I was in the mood for some fuckery I engaged in the conversation. Plus the line at Walgreens was long, which seems to ALWAYS be the case, so there was some time to waste.
Her: Is that all yo hair?
Me: In my mind *Well hello. How are you? Good? Ok.* What I actually said: Yea. I’m natural. I get it straightened to trim it 1-2 times year.
Her: I’m natural too but I can’t wear it like that. I have to get it blow dried out or wear a sew-in. It’s just TOOOOO nappy.
Me: Yea, my hair is nappy but it doesn’t bother me. I actually prefer my fro over my straight hair. Straight hair is too much work for me. Mine doesn't last because I don't want to keep putting heat on it by flat ironing it.
Her: I just don’t think afros are cute or attractive. I hate the way my hair looks after it is shampooed. I just can’t see me wearing it like that and to be honest most men don’t like it.
Me: *Here we go. Glances at her naked ring finger and then at mine fully clothed. Smirks.* Oh, why you say that?
Her: All the guys I know say they like girls with long straight hair. They wouldn’t date a natural chick because their hair looks cray.
Her: *slight chuckle*
Me: Meh. To each its own. I prefer my men with some sense anyway.
Her: Confused look.
Me: Slight smirk.
Her: But I bet your hair be cute. You look like you know how to rock it!
Me: A bland ass - sometimes.
Cashier: Next in line.
Me: Have a good evening!
Like, please don’t end your offensive, uninvited conversation with an underhanded compliment. No.thank.you. I used to let conversations like these go. I would just smile and laugh it off. But then they started to happen more than I felt like laughing. I thought if they have the audacity and time to make ignorant comments, I could find the time to throw shade often times over their comprehension level.
Don’t let people’s opinions on beauty sway yours. Individuality is what makes us uniquely beautiful. We all have something to offer this world. You can not impact the world being and living like the next person. If we were all supposed to be alike then we’d all be like Beyonce. I mean, why not be the best? Hair is small portion of who we are. Straight, kinky, curly, and everything in between is beautiful! The beauty in being Black is that our hair has the flexibility to do whatever we want it to do. Do what makes you happy! Let's stop comparing and start living.
Has something similar ever happened to you? If so, how did you respond?