By Eboni Elise
Sooo, I can’t seem to make up my mind. By the looks of my biological clock (tick, tock, tick, tock) I feel pressured to make a decision and make it soon. “When are you going to have another baby?” is what’s been heavy on my mind and the dreaded question that I’m asked at least every other week by someone I know. I was even given advice from a lady who I met at a work event - “Don’t wait too long to have another child so your son has playmate.” While she was very sweet, all I could think about is how annoyed I was at having this conversation again. It’s just like when you get married and literally at the wedding people ask when you’re going to have a child? Can I enjoy being married for at least a day!? Please and thank you.
My son, who is the love of my life, just celebrated his 3rd birthday and before you know it, he’ll no longer be a toddler. I have to face the fact that my child-birthing years are slipping away and my ovaries aren’t getting any younger. If anything, they start to twitch every time I see an adorably cute baby.
So what’s my problem you ask? Truth is, it’s me. I’m being a selfish brat at the moment. Or am I really?
I get stressed as it is with balancing marriage, mommyhood, getting to a certain point in my career, attempting to have somewhat of a social life, and enjoy my family. Having 1 child is a lot and I can’t imagine throwing another one in the mix. If I leave it up to my hubby, he would love to have a football team. Well, that ain’t happening sir. Too many things I start thinking about…
Diapers and formula ain’t cheap!
Not getting a wink of sleep during late night feedings and sleep training.
Tantrums in the middle of Target? Oh Lordt!
Potty Training. Do I really want to do that again?
Daycare costs? I might as well hand over my paychecks. Goodbye shopping, vacations, or little luxuries I enjoy.
Finding a babysitter for 2 kids so the hubby and I can have date night?
And don’t get me started on labor and delivery! I didn’t have the best experience or recovery.
But when I think about my son – Would I do it all over again? In a heartbeat.
I don’t want to look up at 40 and regret not having another child. And, yes I know women are having babies later but I ain’t about that life. Having a child has been truly amazing! Watching my son grow reminds me every day of how good and real God is. Being a mom has taught me a lot and I feel like I have a purpose in life.
I would love for my son to have a sibling so that he can experience all of the great things my husband and I do with our sisters and brothers.
I love those moments when my son learned to walk, when he says “I love you mommy” and knows what it means, story time when we get home, or when he jumps in the bed with me to cuddle in the morning.
Having a girl would also be exciting. I would love to have a mini-me.
And a family of 4 just looks darling. Let me think on it some more.
If you ever find yourself in this dilemma, there are 4 things to consider:
- Finances/Quality of Life
- Health and Age
Baby # 2 or nah? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.
Photo by Giu Vicente for unsplash.com; gifs source from giphy.com